If you are considering coming to Panama to look around and get the feel of the place, learn a bit about the local culture and the real estate as well as to scout the country out just to see if it really is the place for you to move then you should seriously consider taking one of our real estate and cultural familiarization tours. Panama is not for everyone and one has to learn to live here just as they would in any other new society they would move to as well. This really is a great place to live or retire but you need to know a few inside secrets to help you get off on the fast track and save yourself some serious time and headaches. The most important free information we could give you would be to take one of our tours. You'll be given information that no other so called experts on Panama will give you. If you are looking for a little free information and would like to meet with us for a few minutes at no cost then contact us and one of our agents will meet with you and explain how we work. We will save you money and many headaches that are common to many people looking for property here in Panama. Our real estate and cultural tour will cost you less than hiring your own bilingual driver everyday and they will not give you the info we will. If you would rather rent your own car and try driving around a country that has no good maps and where very few know how to give directions (especially in English) and every direction is "Over there." You should consider our tour because getting around in this place will be difficult indeed and it doesn't matter where you have lived or worked in the world.

If you are the editor of a major publication or you’re “The Real Estate Oracle” and have and endless pool of serious buyers and are willing to give us a plug then let’s talk....... because nothing is for really free right?

The real estate market in Panama is very funny and almost comical at times. Many owners of property especially the ones living in the city that own apartments really believe their property is worth what some untrained appraiser told them. They are hoping against hope that some stupid foreigner will fly in and save them at the last minute. The problem with this is that most of them over paid for their apartments because there was a building boom that started about 20 years ago and has lasted so far right up to the date of me writing this. Why? Well to start with the U.S. presence here in Panama and a need for more housing for U.S. government employees and their families was the start of it. A U.S. government employee paid about twice as much for rent as a local  did. People were buying five apartments and renting them to U.S. Government employees and paying their mortgages off in a little as five years. They lived off this income. Everyone jumped on the bandwagon, builders, banks etc all sucking the good old USA for as much as they could. This created a false value for the real estate in Panama. Values were based on how much income they would bring in and not the true resale value. This was nothing less than welfare from the U.S. to the property owners that were renting to U.S. government employees who lived in Panama City and near the military bases. 

In 1998 and 1999 there was a rush by many locals to buy up properties in the canal zone as they were slowly reverted to Panama. Why? So they could throw some cheap paint on them and rent them back to the U.S. government employees they were sure would be here until the end of time. Dreaming about doubling up on their mortgage payments and crying about spending $20.00 on a plumber to fix a leaky faucet in the property they rented to someone who pays twice as much as the locals do. About 50% of the  properties in the old canal zone area are holding their values even if most (not all) of the people who purchased these reverted properties got completely ripped off (got the big *YUCA) by the incompetent office called A.R.I. (a local government agency appointed to auction off the properties in the former canal zone areas).  The other 50% that purchased got a fair deal. These are the ones I speak of which are holding their value and have actually increased in value because with the money the owners saved most put it back into the property so it would now sell for a reasonable market price. The 50% who over paid and then invested more into their properties will not have as much luck and for many of them luck is what they will need to sell these properties for the ridicules prices they are asking. Most of these people that paid too much do not live in reality anyway and if one of you happens to be reading this then "yes", I'm talking about "you",  as your stupidity and greed got you to this point so live with it and suffer...... some more...

Well in the year 2000 the champagne ran out of bubbles and left some of the locals with a sour taste in their mouth and a migraine that morphine could not help as the USA announced it could not work out a new deal with the Panamanian government to keep military bases in Panama along with the thousands of high paying jobs it provided to the locals. Many thinking that the US was not really going to leave Panama and many still have this "I'll hold on to my property until I find the right buyer attitude". The kind of attitude that means their property has been on the market for almost three years now and will probably be willed to their children after they themselves die of old age. Maybe they are right though as after 20 years of trying to sell, it then becomes an antique and goes up in value right?

The fact is there must be a middle ground as in most accomplished negotiations there is. This does not mean that a client from outside of Panama comes here and offers someone half of their asking price either. For example we had a couple from Ohio here a few months ago and every property that was shown to them the lady kept crying about "Well in Ohio I can get this and this and that for this price!" If that is the case go back to Ohio and buy two of everything please. I've been to Ohio and although it does have it's appeal for some it does not have climate as nice as here. It does not have wild bananas, papayas, toucans, parrots, a Caribbean sea and pacific ocean an hour apart not to count beautiful mountains, maid's service for $8.00 a day and yellow fin tuna filets for $1.50/lb at the local fish market. You can get some good deals here but that all depends on what you think a good deal is. This crap some people are putting on the internet about Panama is a land "Gold Mine" and that you can buy a piece of Caribbean beach front property for $1000-$2000/acre is just B.S. coming from a "Bullchitero" (local word for Bullshitter pronounced (Bull che terro). And Bocas del Toro is full of "Bullchiteros" some of them gringos who were ask to leave Costa Rica after they were caught selling land to other gringos. I'm talking about land they did not really own or have the right to sell them. In other words "Con-Artist", "Scam Artist" etc. The bad part is that they left Costa Rica and moved to "Bocas del Toro". Here is some more free advise and we don't give much "FREE Advise" because it costs us time and money to obtain it ourselves. If someone is pushing a project on you and there is a lot of "hype", free alcohol, the word "Deal" comes up more than 3 times in 10 seconds, you see many non Panamanians being pitched about the "DEAL" then bend over and get ready for the "YUCA" because that's probably the only thing you will get for your money. If it were such a "DEAL" then why oh why haven't the locals jumped all over it? Oh! so you think just because they live here they have no interest in owning a piece of Caribbean beach front for $1k-2k / acre as well? Nonsense! They would love to buy at those prices if it were available and if it were a legitimate deal they would have already purchased there and would have known about it way before you did or even the crooked guy pushing it. The only way to buy Caribbean or Pacific property at really low prices is to buy it in bulk (50 acres or more) and to get someone who is lucky enough to have it or know someone who is dumb enough to sell it at that price. We have watched over 10 people purchase these "Deals of a lifetime" only to find out a year or so later that what they got was some piece of paper that could not even be used in an "out house". Why did they get screwed? Greed! Yes greed is the weakness of many of these victims who cry about having to pay someone to do a background and title search on the property. They don't want to spend the few hundred dollars it takes to verify the paperwork so they end up losing thousands and crying about how they got ripped off! We don't feel sorry for them as they were begging for some "YUCA" and someone came to the rescue and gave it to them.....hard and fast....

A FEW WORDS ABOUT "THE YUCA"

*YUCA (aka CASSAVA) - A long fibrous tropical root used as a food staple, in soups, stews, fried, mashed,  making tapioca or in more recent times what a crooked person or dishonest business, will give a unprotected or misinformed buyer of anything in Panama. This is a Panamanian slang about what happens when you get screwed on a deal.
The YUCA is not complimentary or limited to Panama. About 99% of all people who "got the YUCA" paid or invested something in advance for it. Take for example the Enron employees and investors". This is also an example of the cross border capabilities of the "YUCA" as I mentioned not just limited to Panama. The "YUCA" is more of an emotional act than a physical one (unless requested). The individual or group that receives the "YUCA" normally feels a sense of being taken advantage of, a loss of power (and money) along with the feelings of being embarrassed of their own ignorance.  There are also local words and phrases used for the act of giving or receiving the "YUCA" i.e.,
"Me enyucaron" - What someone says when they get "The YUCA"
"No enyucarme" - What you should say to the person you believe is getting ready to give you "The YUCA" This is normally said as a preventive measure but is not guaranteed to save you from getting "The YUCA" 
The word "Juega Vivo" is what you call the person who is trying to give you "THE YUCA". It means literally the "Game of Live" or a "Lively Gamer" or in the USA a "Player". In Panama people sometimes actually admire people who give others "THE YUCA". They consider it talent at the game of life. The term "Gringo Vivo" is normally used by the locals to describe a North American who is smart enough not to get "THE YUCA" because they are "Good at the game"! "Gringo Juega Vivo" is the term used by the locals to describe a back stabbing dishonest North American who comes to Panama thinking that everyone here is stupid and can be taken advantage of. Big mistake indeed!

Realtors and Listings in Panama

Real Estate Listings in Panama “DO NOT EXIST” as you think they might. In the U.S. for example a realtor or “Listing Agent” will get the a property exclusively listed on a MLS (Real estate Multiple Listing Service) and because there is NO MLS in Panama to date there must be a reason for this, right? Well to start with in a MLS system there has to be some type of trust and respect across the board. The more properties a realtor can get on a MLS the more other realtors will see them and help the “Listing Agent” sell those properties. It makes the owner’s happy as they see movement on their property and they know there are numerous realtors out there trying to sell their property for them with one realtor, “The Listing Agent” in charge of it and making sure that all other realtors follow the rules and ethics of selling their property. It’s a very effective system as all realtors evolved in the transaction split commissions making a little but helping them and owners sell more properties so at the end of the month they may have sold 3-4 properties versus maybe one if this system did not exist.

Reasons a MLS has not existed in Panama are:

1-     Many owners do not trust the realtors.
2-     Many realtors do not trust the owners.
3-     Many developers do not trust the realtors
4-     Many realtors do not trust the developers
5-     Many realtors do not trust other realtors
6-     Frankly, not many people in this business trusts anyone!
 
There must be a reason for all this distrust right? Right!
One word can explain it all “Greed”; yes greed is the reason for all this.

The realtors want to make as much as possible without having to split their commissions. The problem with this is that when an owner gives them exclusivity they try to sell it themselves to keep all of the commission. Some realtors don't understand that it is better to make 2.5% four times a month than 5% once a month. So since the property owners see no movement of potential clients coming to look at their properties they get angry and then the next realtor that comes along and ask for exclusivity gets a quick “NO” answer from the property owner. That does not mean that exclusive agreements do not exist because they do. Exclusive agreements are given to open minded hard working realtors that move a lot of properties and get other realtors to help them as well. There are some very good realtors in Panama that will move heaven and earth to sell a property for a owner and and extremely informed about ROI, financing and long term value. Those are the type of realtors we have working with us. 

This looks like it is all the realtors’ faults eh?  Not exactly true. A realtor may ask for exclusivity here, get it and do the right thing by putting the property out on the market, spending their money and time to promote and hopefully sell the property for the owner. The problems start when other realtors hear the property is on the market in which they would have never known the property was for sale to start with without the exclusive realtor promoting it through local channels or the media. When they find out the property is for sale they quickly try to find out who the owner is and take a client directly to them. They try and cut a side deal with the owner for a lower commission fee and many of the greedy owners will do this and thus sticking it to their exclusive realtor and then trying to weasel out of a deal they signed with them. So the exclusive realtor did all the marketing and all they got for it was “The YUCA”. Many property owners here are just as greedy and dishonest as many of the realtors.
I’ll give you an example.
I have a realtor friend a few months ago who had a client from Florida. This client was looking for a nice apartment with a view of the ocean. She had another realtor friend of hers who said he had a beautiful apartment in Punta Paitilla (an area of the city) and that he had an exclusive listing agreement with the owner. Her client from Florida looked at the property and agreed to purchase. The purchase went through and all were happy. The lead realtor (her friend) was supposed to collect the commission check from the owner and they were to split the commission. A month goes by and the owner of the property had not paid and appeared to be stalling on the payment. She kept calling her friend the other realtor and asking him what was going on. Her realtor friend was avoiding her and not returning her calls just like the owner. She became suspicious and had another friend of hers run a background check on the owner. You’re going to laugh in a couple of seconds.

The owner of the property was a career criminal with a background in blackmail, extortion, drug money laundering, racketeering, robbery, embezzlement, fraud and even implicated in murder. He had been imprisoned in Europe and the USA. The funniest thing she found out was that he was the “Bagman” who delivered the initial $50,000 payoff to buy the silence of the Watergate burglars. Only in Panama people will you find “Old Pirates” like this.  This guy was never going to pay her because he had never paid anyone in his life. At 68 years old how were you ever going to teach a guy like this to be honest….?  Isn’t going to happen is it people? The really sad part was that her friend who knew the owner got his commission check. Basically her friend and the owner conspired to not pay her. She went to the real estate commission board and filed a complaint. After one of the board members questioned her friend the realtor why he had not paid her commission yet his response was “Oh, she forgot to go by and pick up her check”. Now this was her friend that she had know for years sitting here lying his ass off to the board and saying she was to blame for not picking up her check. When asked why didn’t he go and get it for her to remedy the situation he replied “I’ve been busy”. Needless to say she has not been paid yet and he hasn’t returned her phone calls either. The board is “still investigating” meaning they are not going to do a darn thing.   

So that is the main reasons there is no MLS in Panama. Because a MLS has a lot of trust built into it and in a country where you can trust “Very few” it would be very hard to do but we are going to take a swing at it and we’ll let you know in a few months how we’re doing.

If you’re a realtor or property owner here who is honest and can abide by our terms and regulations after you meet our requirements then we would be interested in speaking with you so shoot us an email at: PanamaMLS@yahoo.com.

By the way if you want to read more about this dirt bag “Juega Vivo”  Gilbert J. Straub then go to Google.com and type in the following: Panama: Gilbert Straub and read a very interesting congressional document about the hand over of the Canal. Go to the bottom of page 22 and read the last paragraph where it mentions Gilbert Straub by name. 
Attn: This scumbag hangs out in various restaurants in Panama City looking for victims to rip off. The above mentioned by name “Juega Vivo Snake” hangs out at “Friday’s Bar & Restaurant”  in the Marbella area of Panama City or 

How to avoid becoming known as a "Juega Vivo" 

Panama is a small country of about 2.8 million people equally divided in population between men and women. There is NOT a 2 or 3 to 1 ratio of women to men like many think. Most of the population is also related not to mention that Panama City is just a "large town" and not much happens around Panama without someone finding out about it down the road. Gossiping is the national sport and pass-time here. If you think you can go to Panama and "use" the realtors to show you around the country for free then you are in for a surprise. Some people think they can get a free vacation by having a realtor drive and fly them all over the country at the realtor's expense so they can then just go behind the realtor's back and try to cut a deal with the owner and cut the realtor out of their hard earned commissions which are lower than commissions in North America anyway. You won't find a realtor in the USA, Canada or Mexico that will take you all around those countries "Looking" at their own expense so why would you expect them to do it in Panama? Do you know a realtor in the USA or Canada that will drive you 2-3 hours one way to another state just to here you say, "I am just looking around and trying too see if I want to live here or not". If you want to do that then at least tell the realtor in advance and offer to pay them for their gas and time. Many realtors will do thin Panama if you are honest with them and at least respect their time by giving them what a taxi driver would  charged you. If you want a quick name for yourself in Panama then you just abuse a realtor's time here and you will see very quickly that many of the realtors are starting to work together especially after we started writing about this. If they don't work together then they are at least talking with each other about the problems they are having with foreigners trying to abuse them and their services. I'll give you an example:

A couple of months ago a little Italian lady from the USA (Florida) came to Panama "looking" for a new place to live. She came with her American boyfriend and quickly contacted a realtor here to see some properties. She bragged about being the number one condo salesperson in Hollywood, California for twenty years. Every property she was shown did not meet her "personal requirements" meaning that she liked many of the properties she was shown but did not like any of the kitchens, bathrooms or bedrooms. She said she loved they apartments but that she would have to spend fifty to ninety thousand dollars on each apartment to turn it into something "she could live in". Said that the owner would have to drop the price at least fifty to ninety thousand so that she could do her "personal renovations". She said this about EVERY property she liked! After the 5th property she was shown and she said the same thing she got a quick response from the realtor telling her that she was a waste of their time and that she was not being realistic by asking the seller to "Pay" for her personal renovations by asking for such huge discounts that every seller quickly replied to her request as "absurd and an insult to them". The realtor left her and her boyfriend standing beside the road with a curious look on their face. The kind of look that says, "Gee we got made and these people are not as dumb we thought". Within 24 hours no less than 20 other realtors were informed about this lady, her boyfriend and their "game" they were playing. She called us looking for a realtor to help her and we quickly informed her about the story going around about her and how she should learn how to "behave herself" here in Panama. It took us two weeks before we found someone willing to show her properties after she apologized to the realtors and sellers she had been working with previously. This also happened to a Canadian guy that came here and went around with a realtor that showed him a property. He went behind the realtors back and cut the realtor out of the deal but did not know that the realtor came from a very powerful "old money family" with many family members who were very high ranking officials in the government. He had to pay the realtors commission and legal fees as well by trying to be a "Canadian Juega Vivo". Remember that if you are not from Panama then you are an "Outsider". The Moral of the story: You should learn the customs here and make friends with the locals. Don't come to Panama and "Abuse, insult or try and take advantage of the people here" or you will see how quickly you get "ganged up on by the locals" and will be tagged as a "Juega Vivo" yourself.

A FEW WORDS ABOUT BOCAS DEL TORO

Is noni really a miracle cure? snake oil?  or just a quick economic cure for the snake that sold you the untitled land and convinced you they can grow noni and teak on it and make you some money.
Will teak grow underwater? According to the folks that are telling you to grow it on the Caribbean side of Panama it will. Teak needs no more than 2500 mm (98.42 inches) of water a year and needs a  few months of dry weather for the wood to seal. In Bocas del Toro it rains an average of 4500mm (177 inches) a year. Too much rain for teak and the only thing you can really grow there that you could make some money on would be bananas, coconuts,  mold, mildew, moss and concentrated cockroach extract; all of which are probably more healthy for you than Noni juice. 

If you are going to buy anything in Panama especially in Bocas del Toro you had better do your homework. Bocas is full of pirates and some are even Expats with criminal backgrounds. I'm not talking about tax evaders either. I'm talking about people who were run out of other countries because they sold land they were not authorized to sell or didn't even own. Some of them have big projects in Bocas and appear to be doing quiet well. The question is where will they be five years from now when all those people who are waiting on those titles they were promised find out they got stiffed. I'll give you a hint. "They won't be in Panama" because most of them have their bags packed ready to move out at a moments notice NOW! 

Contact us now at: PanamaMLS@yahoo.com for more information about our services that can prevent you from getting "THE YUCA".